catching up on updates

Gosh if only i can have a record of all my facebook statuses..that would be good enough to be a blog. It can get tedious to blog sometimes cos i have so much to write about! i don't write fast enough on the iphone and i am not always at my computer.

Anyway i was looking back at my posts to help me recall what Eliza was like at 5-6months. There are times that i wished i would have written more. Now with my scant blogging of our life here in Canberra, i hope i really can remember!

On Eliza & eating
Now that we have dropped 3 milk bottles (no more 'old' milk!), we have to get her to eat her morning breakfast of weetbits/bread w ham & cheese & spread and/or yoghurt/ pancake. Usually if she has her 180ml milk..then the next food is some mid-morning tea. As you know how difficult it is to get her to sit down and eat, we insist she doesn't go play or watch vcds or eat sweets till she has had her proper breakfast (and that's also after brushing teeth).
Oh and i discovered the magic of eating off a 'satay' stick. For the first time, she ate salmon, just like that...but only because it was grilled on a satay stick!
I do try to cook food that she will eat....so as much as i love some food like capsicans, i'll make sure i leave it out for her. But greens like spinach / bok choy will be cut up and mixed up with the rice..else it's her favourite seaweed lo.
The meals take on an average of 45-60 minutes to finish..really that long but oh well...my mum said that i also took really long to finish my meals anyway...and it's in front of the tv.

On Eliza & behavioural management
Oh and we have started the happy face/sad face system which helps her to follow the 'rules'.
- No 'buts' or 'hmmm!' when called to brush teeth / bathe
- Sitting down at the dining table to have meals
- Tidying up when told
- Helping out when she can (ie. play with Emily, put her clothes to the laundry)
- Obeying mummy/daddy's instructions and not deliberately doing what she should not do. (ie. shout or make noise when Emily's sleeping..)
- going to sleep on her own (so no mummy/daddy in the room when she falls asleep)
- no crying at night and insisting that we sit beside her (usually Ww's the one who goes to her room and ends up squeezing in her bed too...if i do, i will scold her if it is not a valid reason for calling us..yes, i'm stricter..and to some extent she is afraid i will scold her)

On Emily & sleep
After we came back from our weekend at Batemans bay, we kinda had to start sleep training all over again. After all, we Beco-ed her whenever she needed to sleep. But she slept relatively well in the nights while we were there..maybe it's because i was sleeping beside her or just that she slept well. (ok she did her usual early 5-6am wake ups like her usual self but that was bearable somehow).
Anyway i just could not tahan having her scream her lungs out even with us patting her to sleep (i really don't know why she must scream so much) and i didn't want to be carrying her to sleep. I did sense that she wanted to suckle to sleep but she would wake the moment i shift her if she nursed to sleep, and the pacifier can't stay in her mouth, and she doesn't quite suck her fingers/hand either. I really didn't know what I could give her to soothe her...or is her screaming part of her way of settling? geee...how unsettling! Sometimes she gets so worked up, i really don't know how to calm her. It's like she wants to sleep but can't sleep.
Somehow we were still taking like 3 hours to get her to sleep for the night (forget the daytime..that's another nap monster). On 2 or 3 nights i faintly remember her waking almost every 1.5hrs and/or took quite a while to go back to sleep, even after i fed her.

I tried swaddling her and one of the nights she was struggling and managed to turn to her tummy while in her swaddle (Ww was helping to settle her then). Somehow he started getting her to sleep on her tummy and it was much better! She does sleep longer on her tummy! It's not that i have not tried that before but she has always struggled so much to sleep that when i put her on her tummy previously, she seemed like she hated it. Thankfully she is sleeping much better like that! So far the past 3 nights she managed to sleep till her dream feed at about 11ish-pm. I can do bedtime with Eliza, talk to Ww and prepare food for the next day. Wow...what a super relief.

Next to tackle is the daytime naps and the nighttime sleep (after i sleep)!
Daytime naps are really tough..i have resorted to Beco-ing her so that she can really have a good nap..and i'm not sure if it's cos she manages to sleep about 1-1.5hrs on the Beco in the mid-day that she's sleeping much better at night. I have also been trying to put her down for naps in her cot, and on her tummy. Finally today she managed a 20min morning and afternoon nap...and with about 10-15min struggle though. After that i usually have to get her up and then Beco her to get her to finish the nap else she'll be just too tired. The late afternoon nap is the hardest, even in the car where she'll fuss and fuss and find it difficult to sleep. I also find that getting her to wind down 1hr 45mins after she woke up, instead of 2hrs, is better to help her sleep without becoming overtired. phews!
Even Eliza knows Emily's pattern...thankfully Eliza, when I'm getting Emily to nap in the room, i'll get Eliza to play on her own or watch a video.

On being with Eliza and Emily
So with cooking to be done and Emily's sleep to be settled, baths to be done...the rest of the time is up to our imagination. Eliza loves to play...whatever inspires her. Recently, it has been the confetti which we find it quite a mess and it is difficult to pick up. While she plays on her own, she also loves our company and I also love to be able to play with her, just that i can't do so like i used to when it was her alone. Then, i didn't even have to do any cooking or housework so i would spend a lot of my daytime freetime with her. It is so different now, even trying to squeeze 'school' time must be well planned (when Emily's just fed and happily playing on her own).
Then i also want to spend time singing and reading to Emily, even though i do carry her a lot and spend a lot of time trying to get her to sleep! but that is sooo different from playing with her. I love Emily's burst of smile and laughter when I play with her. Our little 'monster'!
So it is with the 2nd one, getting a lot less attention than the first..then again with Eliza went back to work when she was 2months old (for 3 days a week) so I did see her less somehow. But when i was home i was quite with her as much as i can. Plus she was lucky to have the attention of her grandparents.  Emily's lucky to have the attention of mummy then...well at least when i'm not doing stuff with Eliza or cooking or housework or whatever.
Eliza's not the sister who is dying to have a younger sibling to play with and Emily's so young, it takes a lot of explaining how babies are so that she understands that what Emily does (the crying!), and the kicking and flinging of arms which may accidently touch her is not deliberate. Cos Eliza can be oh-so-sensitive so we need to be patient and to explain to her. It helps her a lot when we explain to her and it does take her time to get used to or understand it. Like the christmas giftbox our church is preparing, she was so upset that it isn't for her but after some explaining to her, she is eager to put stuff inside to send to the less fortunate kids.


Off cooking today cos food for tomorrow is more or less prepared. I really should plan for the week instead of almost day by day...this really does take getting used to! And estimating how much we can eat, sometimes i don't think i cook enough cos I underestimate Ww's appetite!

Nice to have my nights back...:)

More to add on soon, i wish i can write more but it's 1030pm and I'm a little sleepy. Just gave Emily's dreamfeed...which is a little early, i felt. Hopefully she doesn't wake up too soon and sleep well for the night and not wake at 5+am!

When will you sleep, emily?

I'm so torn and yet frustrated. It has been 4 days trying to let Emily cry to sleep for nights. It was still ok the first two days. Actually it was great on day 2. But not good after that. Except for day2. It still took Emily 2-3hrs to go to sleep, ending with a feed and not cos she managed to settle herself to sleep! What IS wrong??
(that was written 2-3days ago. So far the last two nights Emily has slept relatively well. That is she had fallen asleep at 7ish and lasted till 12ish am! Actually one of the nights she slept till 4ish am from 8ish pm)

I wished someone can really help me here without having to pay like $100+ to get an expert. I wish someone can tell me exactly what to do when she had managed to settle and yet wake up 5-15mins later screaming again. we did the cry 12mins thing for like 4 times! Cos everytime I went in to settle her and it's not pick her up, she will eventually sleep after like 5-10mins and then wake up again 5-15mins later! That is as long as her sleep cycle is. That is how long she sleeps
each time I put her down for a nap.

On Wednesday I started to tackle the naps. she slept 30mins for morning nap (miracle!) but i wondered if it's cos I put her down in my bed. Mid day nap was 15mins only. I tried putting her in my bed but no success this time. Afternoon at 345pm she managed to sleep another 15mins soothing herself with sucking the pillow but woke up crying and that pillow sucking no longer soothed her. In the end in my desperation to get her to sleep more and longer so she can make it to bedtime I rocked her to sleep and carried her till I had together dinner ready at 445pm.

Why? I asked God why? Why won't she sleep? Last time Eliza will not fight sleep as badly as Emily. Aka scream when she wants to sleep. As much as I enjoy carrying Emily, I can't carry her ALL the time to get her to sleep and when she is sleeping! I guess it is also in her temperament that she is like that.

From day 1 her crying when she resist bathing will send Eliza running out of the room as far as she can. My mil who bathed the crying Emily said that her ears were ringing after that. I don't remember Eliza crying to be that loud! Haha.

So even as we endure this sleep training, I am also learning to be consistent. There are many times when I really do not know what to do next. Do I pick her up or settle her on her cot or let her continue her nap or what? I really want to pick her up many a times but I also soon came to realize that I am giving her mixed signals. I read somewhere that we are teaching them to form good sleep habits. I can't say Eliza was a fantastic sleeper but she was, in comparison, an easier one. But then she also had her pacifier to soothe her to sleep which doesn't work for Emily. And Eliza had the itchy problem which wakes her and me up frequently at night. Sooo every baby is really different.

The naps are hard to tackle but we'll get there. The first few days is really tough cos I couldn't do much when I left her to protest. I would be outside with Eliza and there's once Eliza probably noticing my *i dunno what to do now* state, hugged me and said "it's ok mummy. It's ok" *melts*!

We continue to pray that Emily will learn to settle on her own to sleep and sleep longer. Ie not just 20mins only. I know it is not enough for her cos she gets tired really fast if I get her up.

To better sleep days ahead!

Sleep and emily

Today we start sleep training.

Because I can't be carrying Emily to sleep OR rocking her at her rocker and standby there till she finally finishes her sleep (cos she sleeps like 10mins and will scream awake..of course there are times she does a cool 15-20min stretch, IF we don't make sudden noises)

Because she has been taking 3hrs to settle for the night! Which means I start her feed at 615pm and by the time she really falls asleep without waking up after 10mins is abt 9plus pm. It wasn't so bad before she had a cold and I also suspected she was teething. So did that extra carrying and TLC make her dependent on me to carry her to sleep...and continue carrying her as she slept. It is as if everytime I put her down on her cot to sleep it is like I placed her on an ice block and she will struggle to get out.

Because she hasn't been sleeping well or long enough in the day unless we Beco her when we are out. I had probably 5-6 times she EVER napped for 1hr on the rocker. But never in the cot.

Because I feel like a slave to her sleep.


Because I completely disappear in the evenings to settle Emily and don't get to do much evening stuff with Ww and Eliza, much less bedtimes for Eliza. It has happened a few times, I read a book to Eliza and Emily starts crying again..oh I should say scream? Even Eliza will know to tell Ww to go settle Emily while I finish reading the book to her.

Hello Because who takes 3hrs to get to sleep?!?!?! I don't respond to her immediately but then shouldn't she be sleeping when she has fallen asleep and not wake up at least like 30-40mins later NOT 10mins ltr??

Other than her lack of sleep and lack of being able to sleep, she has been quite perfect. Happy and chirpy.

and if this doesn't work out I'm almost gonna pay someone to help me.

I don't know any no cry solution cos the eventually still lead me to carrying her. We tried. Carry and pat her till she sleeps and hopefully a deep one and slowly put her down for fear of waking her up and she still does anyway. :( until at some point I do a final nursing and final rocking and putting her down and then she'll be sleeping relatively well for the rest of the night.

I'm followig Tizzie Hall method and praying this works out: that Emily will learn to self settle.

Eating or not

Loves it that u can make many food from simple ingredients in the pantry...if only Eliza eats most it and eats it fast.

I've been hooked on reading recipes and choosing those which I can cook, doesn't require too fancy equipments like blending (but I'm trying that out soon) and steaming (cos I don't have the equipment other than a microwave steamer). And also food that doesn't require fancy ingredients so I don't have to buy new things with my grocery budget starting to burst and it is only the mid month. I have been mystified by how my muffins never turn out right with this oven...


So far some 'adventurous' food I've tried is making bread and pizza base.

 

These which require rising has been tricky with Emily when she's awake and when I'm alone with the girls. I tried the bread when my mil is around and that worked quite well. The first time I tried the pizza base it was...so so. Last night I tried it again and it gave a nice soft base wooo! I tried avocado cream cheese dip which was tad too sour (I followed the recipe!) tried salsa, and sushi which eliza will eat with gusto. The fastest she can eat which is out of the normal.

I hate getting her to eat. We tried with the tv but at some point she would be so caught up watching that she would take 1.5hrs to eat!! I would find myself nagging at her or feeding her which i do not want. Ww's much more patient but on one night he also got quite upset at how long she took to eat....and when she did not finish, she said she's hungry and asked for snacks instead. So we switched back to eating at the table. She was eating at the table but that's another long story.

So the rule now is to eat at the table and no getting down from the chair till she finishes. And i also help by letting her choose a bit...as in letting her just have rice if all she wants is rice and not the rest of the veg/meat. Yesterday was rice and seaweed..and that WAS fast.

So far it has been good and i'm trying out more breakfast varities for her soon since she no longer has her powdered milk to drink. So her calcium intake will be through yoghurt, her chocolate milk and cheese. When she had her 'old' milk to drink, she'll be full enough such that she will juz graze the rest of the morning till lunch. Now she doesn't i've got to give her more for breakfast and a good healthy one too. It doesn't help that she's sloooow (and distracted) at eating other than sweets/chocolates/salty stuff.

We have always sparingly given her these stuff until....she started school and those food in party bags are all the junk food! potato chips, cheezels, sweets, chocolates, twisties...we'll always hide the forbidden 'foods' when we get home and give her some 'approved' ones. Of course we do let her indulge and that's as much. somehow she'll forget the rest that we have hidden.

So hello cooking! I have discovered the joys of experimenting...and choosing foods that Eliza will eat. Plus cooking at the right time! (like at night) or in the morning so i don't have to cook the rest of the day, or freeze foods. 

2 months on

Today

Meals:
Made sweet and sour chicken and stir-fry veg (broccoli, cauliflower, baby corn & carrots). Eliza declared she liked all (except the broccoli) so she ate really fast.
Still trying to figure out the best time to cook...some stuff are good to cook at night but i prefer cooking before we eat. And with Emily's naps to consider oh well we'll go with the flow... Today i tried frying the chicken before Ww left...phews..emily had to scream for milk. (didn't she drink like 1.5 hrs ago?)
We have found a nice balance to having Eliza eat cooperatively. She watches her dvds and eats. Not the most perfect scenerio but oh it works for us. She is happy watching and eating..no complaints, no rolling around on the chair, no us nagging her...though she can't sit on her chair either...but that's her...my mil says her butt has needles..can't sit still.

Sleep:
Eliza is sleeping on her own in her room. It is better since my mil left cos she's not scratching as much. weird how my mil's presence seemed to encourage the scratching. But we have her crying when she wakes up in the middle of the night but as long as she doesn't call us we don't quite go to her. After 2 weeks she's doing better, though not perfect. She also falls asleep faster..partially cos she doesn't nap if we don't go out or that...hmm i dunno.
Emily seem to improve on her length of her naps...else her 15min nap was driving me nuts with her having to sleep in 2hrs b4 she gets overtired and give me more problems. We also have whispering time (with Eliza when Emily naps) so that Emily doesn't startle awake. Eliza has been really cooperative. sweet jiejie. These few nights though, Emily hasn't been able to settle well to sleep...or more like taking longer to settle to sleep. I'm wondering if it is cos i was stretching her bedtime later or she's teething(?) or what??? I have been getting her to sleep frm 6pm, with a feed (a looong one cos that's the time she's the least distracted) and then 1/2hr to settle. On good nights she sleeps till 3+am and then 6+am...on some nights she'll wake at 1+am which means she'll wake again 3hrs later and not sleep(!!)..like last night. yawnsz. Oddly she hasn't been up for her 'dream feed' and if she isn't, i don't quite want to wake her though...so even though i warm her milk in a bottle before i go to sleep...she hasn't been drinking it. I'm suspecting that she's not enjoying drinking from the bottle. :S just like how she doesn't take to the pacifier.

Others:
I have spots in the house to pack and sort...still not done...wardrobe in a mess generally (my version of mess = not sorted out yet)

I love grocery shopping :P

I love how the cherry blossoms are everywhere

Weekends are for going out too...with Ww, exploring the lake side places, some markets, etc. Sat a kids train ride last week.

Went to a family cell group and enjoyed the company (me mostly with Emily though, cos she had to nap) and the food :) Our church has mainly chinese people from all over, Sg, Msia, PRC, TW...We wanted to go there cos when my inlaws are here they can attend the church too and go to the chinese service (cos the one we go to is an English-speaking service). Enjoy the sermons there though. :)

Eliza:
Eliza has been crazily cutting paper and creating interesting stuff from it...like coins to buy things, made a dress, diapers for her Elmos & her...all from paper. She also creates her super interesting Lego cities and whatever...like a movie theatre. That's her 'work'.

We have started on some number writing without the guides.
We have started on learning sounds of S, T, A, I, N, P. I think she's still getting the hang of the alphabets coming together to make a word.
We have been reading some chinese books, just to enjoy them.
We have been singing MORE songs & nursery rhymes

Emily:
Has been rolly polly. :P
I hardly see her skin cos she's so wrapped. Recently I found super dry skin around her arms :( so gotta moisturize 3-4times a day and she has been much better.
She's the one who bathes the least often...cos she cries when i lower her to the bathtub, and cos she hardly really gets that dirty anyway. But i do wipe her down everyday in the evening or late afternoon.
Love her burst of smiles and mini dance when she opens her eyes and see me in the morning.
Love to hear her ee ee ehh ehh at me in a conversation only she knows.
Love to watch her watch Eliza play and her inquisitive eyes as she looks at things.

Sydney weekend

This is a backdated post.. I have much to write just haven't got down to it

We are in Sydney! Like a little holiday for us even though we are sending my mil back to Singapore. Gonna miss her dearly, for her company, her food and her help with our girls. For once we'll feel what ut is like to be on our own. The real thing! Scary but also a great learning experience. The good is also that we can have lesser influences on how we bring up our kids and the habits that come along. Things like getting Eliza to do her toilet business on her own, something my mil will do for her and something I'll 'dictate' her to do and praise her for doing it all on her own after that. It's slower but a important step to independence. Actually she was quite on auto run back in SG at my Mum's place to the extent that I didn't even know she went to pee. Here, there's no potty and so a toilet cover, a stool she needs to bring in, 3 layers of pants to pull down, a tap that's not easy to turn on when she needs to wash her hands...

Anyway, coming to Sydney made me feel like the city is so crowded and busy, and that I liked the space, peace and quiet in Canberra. Although temperatures here are 10deg more at night which is soooo comfortable. Finally I can see my skin! And bathing is enjoyable. Eliza played water with her toys in the huge corner bathtub which is loads of fun for her.

Enjoying the delicious Chinese kinds of breads and food here. Mmmm. We ate so much during lunch we almost skipped dinner.

Anyway our hotel is wonderfully spacious ad Eliza absolutely loved it though she's sleeping with my mil tonight. We turned in early...like at 7pm cos Emily was tired already and Ww and I had time to chat for abt almost 1.5hrs..in the toilet mostly, geee cos our snacking was getting a little too noisy for sleeping emily...sigh this girl needs ear plugs! Ww cough quietly and she woke up crying (time like happened twice back home at night). No wonder she can't sleep in the day?

Anyway we'll enjoy the warm weather while we can.

Meanwhile I'm gonna sleep and shift Ww so that he stops snoring!!

Monday record

Weather: rainy so it was cold. Colder weather this week after fantastic warm weather last week.

Morning: woke at 730am cos Emily was up at 520am for milk n took a while to sleep after that. I woke up to find myself still carryig her upright as her head on my shoulder. And Ww still asleep!
Did some tracing and cutting activities with Eliza and read a story with her while Emily took her short 15 min nap in the rocker.

Lunch: oyster sauce bok choy, abc soup frm last week (it was frozen), butter chicken frm last week.
Eliza was watching Playschool DVD on e computer borrowed from the library

Afternoon: me trying to get Emily to sleep. The schedule is all haywire when I let her oversleep. Tried to get Emily to sleep on her cot, which after the fifth attempt she finally slept a good half hour. Else I'm back in the room attending to her cries in 2mins from the time I left the room with her asleep.


Eliza was creating all sorts of stuff with her Lego and was later watching Sesame street before going to bathe.

Evening:
Ww went to do a pick up of toys from Theodore via freecycle which was sort of a let down. But we had a few toy animals, balls, an empty doll house, some books.
Emily was at her usual feeding earlier but kinda took till now, 845pm to zz...from 615! Grr. Actually she slept by 7pm but kept waking up to burp or complain. Sometimes I dunno if she is still hungry but is so tired she falls asleep drinking. Gee..gonna fall into the trap of nursing her to sleep. So I'm expecting her next feed at around late 11pm before I sleep. Bottle feeding her at that time is the only way she'll sleep a longer stretch, so much for not expressing milk. I still do twice a day (in the morning to 'drain' the excess and at night b4 I sleep)

But love the quiet evenings, especially when Eliza sleeps early. My mil will be playing angry bird (it's a daily entertainment especially when we don't have tv). It's also the time Ww and I get to talk, do our stuff, do the misc household stuff etc.